Romantically, we all want to be loved, desired and validated. We’re emotional beings in seek of what makes us happy either actively or at the very least have an unconscious yearning for. ‘Happiness’ is generally considered an object or person outside of us which we hopefully eventually evolve in life to understand really only comes from within.
Something I have recognised in myself and others is when there is a heightened fear of rejection to the point we rely on another to reassure us of the emotions we want to feel. Sometimes these needs are expressed and happily met in relationships, in other instances from what I see the most is in the forms of withdrawal, manipulation and mind games in an attempt to gain a specific reaction that affirms one they are wanted, loved etc.
This behaviour is successful when it plays on another’s insecurities and emotions, it’s psychologically expected to do so but it isn’t an indefinite source to cure the deep insecurity of rejection that is yours. An expectation of rejection will have your mind and heart scanning largely where rejection doesn’t even exist, in the most trivial things that your perception has learnt to only see.
A fear of rejection is an invitation to stop rejecting yourself, to ask yourself deep questions, why do you think you’re not worthy? why do you think you’re not good enough? why is it you think someone can’t love you for you?
I assure you the answers lie underneath the tarnished layers that you think protect you. Loving who you are to your core can’t ever dissapoint you, expecting others to tell and show you what you should already know but deny will though and your limited perception is sure to hurt you.
Loving yourself is the space in which you have the capacity to love others, the love you will receive back is only going to be a natural flowing affirmation of what is already felt and known.